I’m so tired of looking back at the resolutions of the past year and realizing they lasted no longer than a week, which is why this year, my resolutions for 2015 are way less ambitious.
1. Gain Weight
I’m going to quit all good eating habits ASAP. I vow to add carbs to my diet with reckless abandon. I’ll start each meal with a generous helping of bread and rolls onto which I will spread an obnoxious amount of butter. I’ll stuff food into my mouth with such fervor it’ll make other diners uncomfortable to watch. I also vow Continue reading